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Thoughts of Chris
In the last several weeks my thoughts have been of Chris and the Matthews and when I first met Chris. I feel very privileged to have grown up across the street from the Matthews. They moved in across the street from my family when I was 13 and Chris was 6 and Kim was pregnant with Billy. The first time I met Chris, he was in the kitchen of his new house and he was sitting on the floor on top of the tray of his big wooden high chair. He looked up at me with these huge inquisitive eyes. I immediately fell in love with Chris and was fascinated by his development and ability despite having autism and delays.
After Billy was born I began babysitting the Matthews children and we had great fun together. We would go for bike rides with the kids in the buggy, swing at the park, and blast the Lion King soundtrack while we sang and danced. Another favorite was watching and signing along with the Disney Sing Along videos (you know… follow the bouncing ball). I remember one day Chris, Billy, and I watched Robin Hood 4 times. Or trying to pull Chris out of the Suburban when we went somewhere. Those were the days!!
Chris began to grow and I felt honored to help him with things such as riding a bike and swimming. But most importantly I simply felt grateful that the Matthews allowed me to be a part of their lives. It gave me the opportunity to be a part of Chris’s development, his spirit, and love of life. I loved watching Chris run across the yard with a huge smile on his face and letting out this high pitched scream. Nothing bothered Chris and it was an absolute joy to witness!!!
In later years and as a result of my experiences with Chris, I began to pursue a career in education while having various jobs working with people with developmental delays. Chris inspired me to make a difference in peoples’ lives and I will forever be indebted to him for that. During this time I worked with Chris every so often; picking him up from the Merz house. We would go to the movies, swimming, hiking, and out to lunch or dinner. My fondest memories of those times were riding in the car with the music up and Chris dancing, all the while shaking the entire car. Or going to Old Chicago where all the staff knew Chris and he would call all the guys Brian. And of course the classic conversations with folks out and about …”Does Chris vacuum?” “What’s my name?” “Chris wipes tables!”
I was fortunate enough to see Chris often when I would stop over at my parent’s house. Each time I pulled up, I immediately looked for Chris in the yard. It never failed that I was greeted by Chris with a “Hi Megan, how are you, so good to see you!!” and several huge bear hugs. And it never failed that Chris’s greeting brought a smile to my face and brightened my day. Chris and I shared many regular exchanges. We had several noises that he liked and when he saw me he would make them and tell me “You do it!”
Chris also thought my car was exceptionally dirty and he would make comments such as, “Is that your car? It is so filthy. You better wash your car Megan” I would tell him that because he thought it was so dirty, then he should wash it. Recently Chris began to tease me when he would ask me, “What’s my name?” I would ask him what is your name and he would respond with “Fred” I loved making Chris laugh and there were two things that always got Chris going. He loved to hear me honk the horn and I did so every time I left my parent’s house. Chris also loved to back up in the car or see one back up. So I would back my car up real fast while yelling “whooo hoooo!”
It’s the small things that Chris loved and caused me to love him.
I was deeply saddened to hear of Chris’s early passing. And having just lost my mom a year and a half ago, my heart goes out to the Matthews family. I already miss seeing Chris’s bright, smiling face when I pull up at my dad’s house. Chris taught me a great deal in his short time with us. He taught me to love and to laugh and to not take myself so seriously. He taught me patience and kindness and that a hug can cure anything. I will forever be inspired by Chris, his life, and what he meant to so many people. And to the Matthews family … thank you for sharing Chris with me and entrusting his care to me. Thank you also for always advocating for Chris and fighting for what is right. And Chris … give my mom a big bear hug for me!!!
-Megan Syverson
Here is a poem, written by singer/songwriter Bernice Lewis, about Chris. It was originally published in the TRE Quarterly in February 2006.
“I had the great privilege of living with the Matthews family a few years ago while teaching at Colorado College. I fell in love with all of them and am deeply saddened by Chris’ passing. I’ll be back this spring and will sorely miss his company. I wish I could have been at the service…he was a special spirit!
From the far reaches of the east coast -Bernice Lewis”
Christopher Vacuums at Kurtz’s Store
At the cocktail party
Christopher asks everyone
“Do you vacuum?”
everyone is talking real estate, tuition costs, and summer vacation
plans
“Do you vacuum?” he asks the slender blonde
“as little as possible” she answers
spreading pineapple mango salsa on a lo carb cracker
Christopher commandeers the entire bowl of tortilla chips and melted dip
it sits before him like his dinner plate
unspoken
but clearly off limits
no one else dares to dip
“Do you vacuum?”
the newest head of acquisitions at the local bank looks pensive
“is this a trick question?” he wonders to himself
“sometimes” he answers
awkwardly receiving Christopher’s requisite hug
he asks the pre-pubescent girls as they come up the stairs from the
playroom
they just giggle
he asks the housewives in their printed j jill skirts
and cotton boat neck tops
he asks the college kid who is home for the summer
finally satisfied
he sits before a now empty bowl
burps dramatically
and turns to the person next to him, changing the question
“Who am I?” he ask
7/10/06
Colorado Springs, CO
Bernice Lewis
Notes about Bernice Lewis:
She Undoes now available at http://cdbaby.com/cd/blewis4
Recorded in Nashville. Produced by Grammy Award winner Charlie Chadwick
No. 18 on FolkDJ for album in November, No. 16 song for “She Undoes”.
Bernice writes beautifully and deeply.
-Dar Williams
Bernice is really one of the keepers of the flame of Real Songwriting.
-Rosanne Cash
http://www.bernicelewis.com/
http://www.myspace.com/bernicelewis
“Thank you for showing us true greatness. Not many achieve that in this lifetime. Chris is one of the few who has. He struggled; he struggled more than most. He loved – more perfectly than most of us ever will. He smiled and reached out- to everybody. He was selfless. He was extraordinary – and because of your love and care, Chris’ goodness lit up our hurting, wounded world.” – Cindy P.
“I can still picture Chris in his helmet, in the stroller on the back of Dave’s bike, and walking along the ocean with Bill and Dave when we were in Mexico.” – Kim, Bill, Kell, Kimbers and Stu.
“I loved watching Chris work at Josh and John’s. He is beautiful…”- Kim D.
“…My best (memory) of all is using Dave and Kim’s shower … it was big enough that I would throw myself, Christopher and Billy into it at the same time to hose off and we would all jump in and sing songs together. I am pretty sure that my love of cheese-it crackers is due to Christopher as well! – Kevin H.
“What do you say, Pam?” – Chris saying this WHILE ASLEEP and burping and farting on the couch … ‘cuz all day, every time Chris farted and burped while with us at the lake, Pam said to Chris “What do you say Chris?” – Pam
“I remember Chris calling my new girlfriend – future wife “Susanne” – my ex-girlfriends name.” – Charlie H.
“Working in the field of Autism for the last year and a half, I’ve learned to appreciate even more the zest with which you approached Chris’ diagnosis, challenges and passions. Your family is, to me, and so many others, a true inspiration. Your loving ways and Chris’ cheerful spirit will impact me for a lifetime.” – Libby Pelican
“I was new to the world of special education but luckily I had Chris to induct me into the field! J … he taught me so much .. to laugh, to sing, to enjoy everyone for who they are, to smile and be yourself.” – Meghan B.
“My favorite memory of Chris is him laying on the Golf Green while caddying for Dave – now that is relaxation.” – Vinny
I will always have great memories of Chris on the golf course. His favorite saying, after someone hit a bad shot, was “Uh Oh. Give me a hug.” – Jerry and Susan
“While golfing, I remember Dave (Matthews) saying “Just keep walking.” After Christopher dumped Dave Merz’s clubs into the water.” – Ted
“On Halloween, I remember telling my kids we weren’t trick-or-treating on Wood Avenue because they are too old to go out. Steven says, “You mean we aren’t going to stop by your friend’s house and get a hug from that big guy?” Would that we all could be remembered for the hugs we gave! – Jan
Hugging is healthy. It helps the body’s immune system, it keeps you healthier, it cures depression, it reduces stress, it induces sleep, it’s invigorating, has no unpleasant side effects. Hugging is nothing less than a miracle cure.
Hugging is natural. It is organic, naturally sweet, has no pesticides, no preservatives, no artificial ingredients and is 100 percent wholesome.
Hugging is practically perfect. There are no movable parts, no batteries to wear out, no periodic check ups, its low energy consumption, high energy yield, inflation proof, non-fattening, has no monthly payments, no insurance requirements, theft proof, non-taxable, non-polluting and fully returnable!! -Author Unknown
“I loved having Chris as a neighbor all those years. Every time I saw him in the yard he put a smile on my face with a hug, an Austin Powers impression or a simple hello.” – Kristen S.
“Chris was such an integral part of the Old North End neighborhood. We, the many walkers from the townhomes North would often look forward to hearing Chris’ greeting from behind the big black fence.” – Carol
“I always stopped to talk to him when I saw him in your garden. He was very friendly to me. A handsome young man.” – Helen
“We will miss our little visits with Chris as we walked by your house. He was always so eager and interested in us and our little Jesse dog. “Do you know me? Do you know me? Do you know me? What’s my name?” He loved our attention. I always enjoyed our little chats.” – Sharon and Nolan
From Dave and Doreen
I feel so deeply fortunate to have had the opportunity to watch Chris blossom and grow throughout the years. He made people smile wherever he went. Weather he was at the park during summer camp, heading down a mountainside on skis or wolfing down Taco Bell at Dinner and a Movie. Chris did nothing in small measure. I will never forget his laughter and “uhhhoohhhh’s” echoing through the theater during movies or hearing his random questions throughout an outing. It seemed almost each place we went he saw someone he knew.
Recently, a co-worker reminded me of a classic Chris response on one of our trips. Just as he was in his community, Chris was well known throughout the Breckenridge Outdoor Educational Center. Staff there remembered him from years past and always had his ski gear ready to go. They always commented on how pleased they were to see him again. An instructor from England sat with him after a day on the slopes. He was eating a snack, cheese, of course. She asked him “Chris, what sort of cheese is that?” Without looking away or hardly even pausing he simply said “mine.”
We should all have the good fortune to be so sure of the things we love. To not be afraid to blaze our own trail and to share our feelings with the people we care about. Chris knew what it was all about and offered us valuable life lessons. He was most certainly one of a kind and one who will not be forgotten.
Thank you, Chris. Thank you also to the Matthew’s for sharing such a wonderful being with us all.
Fondly, Jaimy C.
Please take a moment to read Chris' Obituary and Guest Book entries from the Gazette- November 2, 2007.